So, tonight I had YoungLife, which was really cool. We just kinda hung out for a little while and then went to go get frozen yogurt. After the majority of people left, my friend had to stay and wait for our leader to give her a ride home so a few of the guys and myself waited with her.
I can honestly say tonight was the best night I've had in a while. We sat and talked and laughed. I felt safe and cared about and those both mean so much to me.
Lately, I've been having a lot of anxiety and stress about starting college next week. I'm terrified of change and the unknown and I've been praying that God help calm my mind. I felt like nothing was happening because every day I've been waking up immediately feeling that burden.
God works in mysterious ways, though.
A lot of people say that they know God's real because of the way they crave something more than earthly things, or that it's just a fact and always has been for them, but for me, it's the people God surrounds me with.
Tonight was what I had been praying for. I felt at ease. I felt comforted.
Sometimes I get really caught up in myself. I go through periods of time where I feel down, I feel like God's not listening, and that's where I've been lately. But in all reality, all this time, God's been talking to me and comforting me through the people around me.
A couple of nights ago, my anxiety was really getting to me. I talked to my best friend about it (she also has anxiety that can get bad) and right before I fell asleep she texted me and said, "Always here! If you can't sleep or freak out in the middle of the night call me and I'll wake up. I get it Ash! You're not alone ever!" She was willing to sacrifice sleep for me. She's always been that way, she's willing to do anything to help me feel better. He shows me I'm not alone by giving me someone who understands what I feel and what I'm going through. I'm so so so lucky God gave me her, I wouldn't be where I am without her. I was at church the other day and the message was even about this. The pastor said, "We don't experience God's love the same without others. We can feel His embrace through others." The hugs she's given me, the advice she's given me, the willingness to sit with me whenever I'm in need is God working through her and comforting me through her.
Each of the people I sat with tonight or talked to at any point tonight were blessings sent from God. I needed to experience the love that I did tonight so badly and I'm so thankful for it. If any of you are reading this right now, thank you. Thank you, thank you, thank you from the bottom of my heart. I needed a good laugh, comforting embraces, to realize that no matter what happens to me, I'm always going to have people to go through it with.
So if you feel like God's not paying attention to you and doesn't care anymore, reconsider and look to the people around you. And also consider that we have the ability to show others who God is by being there for them and loving them in return.
Feeling at a loss? Just take a look around you. God doesn't always speak to you in expected ways.
He always comes through, sometimes we just have to look a little harder.
"To truly experience God, you need to experience His people."
"He uses us to usher His grace."
"Carry each other's burdens, and in this way you will fulfill the law of Christ." Galatians 6:2
"My prayer is not for them alone. I pray also for those who will believe in me through their message, that all of them may be one, Father, just as you are in me and I am in you. May they also be in us so that the world may believe that you have sent me." John 17:20-21
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