Mali-DO IT? (pun credit to Jackie Hernandez)

There's this thing called Beyond Malibu. It's through YoungLife and I'm not going to pretend like I know a ton about it because I don't. All I know is that it's about a week of backpacking through mountains in Canada. And I need to do it.

Some background about me, I get nervous to leave for weekend retreats when I'm allowed to have my phone.

So, how am I supposed to be able to GO A WEEK IN THE WILDERNESS TYPE STUFF?

I don't have any idea. But what I do know is that since the day I heard about it, I wanted it. And tonight a video and an opportunity were both put in front of me and my heart started beating. My leader always says that when her heart starts beating she knows she needs to do something.

I feel a really strong pull towards this. And I mean I've never experienced it before, but I think this is what it feels like when God wants us to do something.

I'm scared, actually terrified is a better word, but it's His will not mine. He knows me better than I know myself, so while I'm sitting here teetering between yes and no for me having the ability to get through it, He's just chillin there waiting for me to shut up and just say yes. I deserve this for myself. All I have to do is say yes. Maybe acquire a passport and a way there, but all I really have to do is say this is what I want for myself.

And put one foot in front of the other and just keep walking. He knows exactly what He's doing and where my path leads me and although its so freaking scary, I'm walking by faith and not by sight.